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Talk with Gary Craig – Clarifications

June 16, 2009 By Betty Moore-Hafter

Originally published in the Rising Sun EFT Newsletter. Sign up for my free newsletter at www.CreativeEFT.com

I recently was in touch with Gary Craig in an attempt to get some clarity on his Open Hand Policy. Many rumors were flying around and there has been a lot of fear and confusion. After my first conversation with Gary, in which he clarified that we can of course continue to call ourselves “EFT Practitioners” (which some people had doubted), Jade Barbee and I decided to put some things into writing and ask Gary to discuss our concerns with us. He was very receptive to this discussion and I believe that a lot has been cleared up. I want to share with all of you what we found out. First, Jade’s report on our talk, then the clarifications that came from this.

From Jade:

As personal EFT friends and colleagues, I wanted to let you all know that Betty Moore-Hafter and I had the opportunity to speak with Gary Craig on Saturday for almost 2 hours.  Long story short, we went through the most worrisome language in the Open Hand Policy together in an attempt to clear up misconceptions and provide clarity for EFT practitioners in light all the big changes and events of late. The good news is that Gary voluntarily made improvements “on the spot”, specifically to what we felt to be the most troublesome language — most notably, the part where he continually said, in essence, *you may practice EFT, just let people know it’s not endorsed by EFT,* which was driving so many of us crazy and pushing everyone’s panic buttons.  This language, which was also communicated in his blogpost, implied a new proprietary level of ownership. If, as it appeared, Gary was claiming ownership of EFT so completely and in a new way, what was left for me as both an EFT practitioner and innovator?

I’ll be honest with you. The conversation was quite tough. We offered what we believed were some valuable creative solutions. Gary listened but, for his own reasons, pretty much resisted most of our creative ideas. However, in the course of our discussion, something very interesting and positive unfolded. Although at times the conversation felt difficult, we took from it an unexpected feeling of peace, not because we necessarily got “what we wanted”, but because he genuinely stood firm with levity and effectively communicated to us an important consistency in his message.  We also felt a degree of mutual understanding.

Our understanding from talking with Gary is that he is mainly concerned that we share our work ethically and honor the symbiotic relationship with Emofree.com. In other words, as long as I don’t pretend that EFT begins and ends with me and I point those I attract to Emofree for core EFT training, I can innovate to my heart’s desire and share my version of EFT in my own unique way — provided that I distinguish it from the standardized EFT training on the DVDs. This solid ground, which Gary is demonstrating his willingness to clarify, feels good to us. And since we’ve put quite a bit of equity into EFT, as many of you have, we have every reason to continue to identify as EFT practitioners.

In light of all the recent questions around the dissolution of the Masters program, the new certification and the Tapping World Summit, it was somehow heartening to know that his biggest concerns are literally incapsulated here. I was impressed that he literally jumped at the chance to change the wording in several parts of the policy.

When we approached Gary as not-yet-certified practitioners, it was from this position of wanting to certify, but unsure just what our common ground with him was. As Betty noted, and I too feel deeply “He gets it, Jade. He’s not going to pull the rug out from under us”.

From Jade & Betty:

Here are our concerns and, to the best of our understanding, the clarifications we received. Gary Craig’s complete Open Hand Policy is available at www.emofree.com/FAQ/open-hand-rights.htm.

1) There had been confusion concerning a part of the Open Hand Policy asking us not to use EFT as “letters behind someone’s name”. Some people were interpreting that to mean that we could no longer call ourselves EFT Practitioners. That is not the case. Gary added a new line to the policy to clarify:

“Non-certified EFT practitioners may use the term “EFT Practitioner” in their signature lines so long as it appears under your name and not after it as typical credentials might appear (e.g. Joseph Moore, PhD, MD, MFT, etc.). Thus an acceptable use of EFT Practitioner for a non-certified practitioner would look as follows…

Joseph Moore, PhD
EFT Practitioner”

2) The confusing language of *feel free to practice EFT but make it clear you don’t represent Gary Craig and EFT* has been changed all through the document. Now it reads as follows:

” In essence, I wish to grant the freedom to ethically practice EFT, give workshops and create books, etc. so long as it is made clear to the public that your EFT activity represents YOUR own ideas, angles, versions etc. and not necessarily those of Gary Craig or www.emofree.com.”

3) The one reference to “official EFT” (which had been in quotes) has been changed to “all about EFT”

“The challenge is that the workshop students expect to learn all about EFT from you, even though you cannot realistically deliver it. Why not?”

[Gary goes on to say that this is because you can’t cover all the material in the DVDs, etc.]

4) People have felt put off by the wording of the disclaimer Gary is requesting. We found out that we may be creative in how we word this. Personally we’re not fond of the negative language of “does not necessarily represent”. Well, we don’t have to use those words. When we ran Jade’s new disclaimer (below) past Gary, he said, “Beautiful.” He had no objections to either of these.

This is Jade’s: “My EFT approach is unique, yet draws heavily upon core EFT principles. For complete, standardized EFT training (including the free weekly EFT Newsletter, the free manual and inexpensive learning DVDs) visit Emofree.com”

This is Betty’s: “Betty’s creative approach to EFT is her own, yet it is deeply grounded in the core EFT principles as taught by Gary Craig. For complete EFT training, including the free manual and low-cost DVD sets, please see www.emofree.com”.

5) Some people have been worried about their website names which include EFT — are they still okay? Yes. We are welcome to continue using EFT to designate our work as long as we include the disclaimer Gary is asking for. For instance, Betty’s www.CreativeEFT.com is fine, as is Carna Zacharias-Miller’s www.MagicalEFT.com

6) People have thought that Gary is restricting us to “basic EFT” or the “original version” with the 9 gamut and hand points, as if this were the only “real” EFT. This is not the case! On the contrary, creative work based on skillful EFT is encouraged. Anyone who leaves the core EFT principles behind and changes things beyond recognition would no longer be doing EFT, of course, but otherwise, we can practice EFT in our own way as freely as ever. For instance, we talked with Gary about our Inner Theater approach. We believe that the EFT we do within this approach is firmly grounded in the core principles we learned from the DVDs — yet Inner Theater is a unique and different way of applying EFT. Gary is fine with this. As you may have noticed, he featured Jade’s article on Inner Theater in a recent newsletter. Another example: Betty’s article on Creative Language was featured in the two new books Gary put out this year, EFT for PTSD and EFT for Back Pain. Our creative innovations are encouraged and valued.

7) We urged Gary to more clearly acknowledge the value of the symbiotic relationship that has always existed between the founder of EFT and the dedicated practitioners who have furthered the development of EFT. It has in so many ways been a co-creation with contributions from us all in the form of case histories, personal EFT stories, new ideas for the art of delivery, etc. These contributions have always been valued and they still are (as demonstrated in the EFT newsletter). We hope that this will be made more clear in the policy.

A rewriting of the Open Hand Policy is forthcoming and Gary will be considering our suggestions as well as those of others. Please do submit your constructive ideas and concerns to temp@emofree.com. Again, you can read through the existing policy at: www.emofree.com/FAQ/open-hand-rights.htm

We hope this information is helpful to you. Please pass it on. We’ve just wanted to have truth, clarity and real information. When we all have that, we can make our own decisions based on what is right for us.

love,
Betty

Filed Under: EFT & Hypnotherapy, Rising Sun EFT Newsletter Archives

Help For My Sleep: EFT 3

June 5, 2009 By Betty Moore-Hafter

originally published in the Rising Sun EFT Group newsletter, 5-31-09

I’m a big fan of using creative language with EFT. My colleague and good friend Jade Barbee has put together a free e-book called EFT-3, and I think it is inspired. He presents EFT as a three-part process of 1) Acknowledge (Set-Up part one) 2) Accept (Set-Up part two) and 3) Allow (Sequence – tapping for “this ___feeling”). What I love about the EFT-3 e-book is that each of these has a full page of suggested tapping phrases — as you fill in the blanks for your issue, the language becomes very powerful.

A PERSONAL STORY – USING EFT 3 FOR MY SLEEP ISSUE

I’ve had problems with sleep all my life. And, yes, I’ve done tons of EFT on this, but that has been a frustrating experience. It is the one thing that, in the past, EFT wouldn’t touch for me. Even working with other practitioners, I never got any permanent improvement with this issue.

Because I often wake up around 4-5 am, around my birth time, I’ve wondered if the sleep disturbances are connected with my birth and possibly my first 8 months of life, during which I had a lot of colic and did not sleep well as a baby (poor parents). I happened to talk with my father recently about this and he told me about rocking and bouncing this little “baby in pain.” As he said, the colic must have been severely painful, like the worst gas pains. It’s so sad to think about, a little baby in pain and nothing that seemed to help (hmmm, sounds like me and sleep!)

So this was on my mind when I started experimenting with Jade Barbee’s EFT-3. I decided to go through the process before bed, tapping for “can’t sleep” and “this baby in pain.” Here are some of the sequences based on Jade’s e-book:

1) Acknowledge

Even though this feeling of “can’t sleep” makes me see “this baby in pain” and reminds me of “those difficult beginnings” and makes me feel “sad”…

Even though I carry this feeling of “can’t sleep” in “my belly”…

2) Accept

I want to make peace with where I am and who I am right now. This is how a part of me feels and I honor this part of me.

I want to transform this “baby in pain feeling” into deep trust and confidence and inner peace.

3) Allow – This ___ Feeling (tapping the points)

This “can’t sleep” feeling….

This “baby in pain” scene in front of me…

I want to fully express this and release this; it’s been exhausting.

All this old feeling of “can’t sleep” which reminds me of “the baby in pain”… that was then and this is now! I can release that old strategy!

There’s a wise part of me that knows… “I survived… I can sleep now, free of pain.”

The phrases above are just a sample, there is much more. I tapped through each page, adapting all of Jade’s language to my issue. One time through the three pages of EFT-3 before bed. And I had an amazingly good night! I did wake up, but I easily went back to sleep.

In the past week, the nights I’ve used EFT-3 before bed have all been nights of good sleep — amazing. One night I slept through, unheard of for me. Several nights, I didn’t do the process and they weren’t as good. So I’m going to make this my routine. What a godsend.

I’m wondering why this process is serving me better than directly working on the issue, which of course I have done (including sessions on the baby core issue.) It’s possible that this wonderful and comprehensive language is reaching the subconscious in a way that is deeply soothing. Tapping through all these phrases may be snagging some things on deep levels and bringing in those reassuring messages in ways that nothing else has. It’s been a fascinating experiment and truly gratifying to get results on such a tough and persistent problem.

I recommend that you pick up a copy of EFT-3 and print out the 8 pages. Especially keep the 3-page process nearby. There’s some great language to glean here for working with clients or yourself. And try the whole thing as a process on some issue. In ways the conscious mind doesn’t have to understand, this may reach deep aspects and roots and bring in healing and shift things powerfully .

Jade is offering this great resource for free. You’ll find the free EFT-3 e-book here:

www.emotionalengine.com

Thank you, Jade, for this great contribution to the tapping world.

Filed Under: Rising Sun EFT Newsletter Archives

Small Session, Big Breakthrough

April 28, 2009 By Betty Moore-Hafter

On our recent trip to Tucson, Arizona to visit our daughter, my husband bought me a beautiful little wall hanging. It has a picture of the extraordinary Mexican artist Frida Kahlo and the words, “The soul thinks in images.”

I love this idea. It has been my experience that whenever we can allow ourselves to think in images, we are indeed closer to the soul level, or the deeper wise mind. One image can embody so much, and when our own images transform and change, things really shift within us.

The Inner Theater work with EFT that I’ve been developing with my friend and colleague Jade Barbee is exciting precisely because it brings EFT into that realm of imagery and inner life. I’ve been amazed at how easy it actually is to go there in an EFT session. And once you’re there, things unfold.

I was working with a woman who is seeking to follow her dreams, make some changes and move in a new direction that would be more authentic for her. But she has felt very blocked. We had talked about the situation and had done a little tapping when she suddenly told me that she was going to have to leave the session much earlier than planned. We only had 18 minutes left! I asked her if she would be willing to close her eyes and do some work through the imagination so that we could get the most out of the little time we had. I guided her into an inner healing room, a “room of possibilities,” we called it. Just being there brought tears.

Tapping: Even though there’s a lot of emotion about this, I can be with my feelings and just let them flow… even though this brings up deep emotion… it’s okay to feel this…

She didn’t know what the emotion was about. She said the room was still empty. I suggested that something might appear in the room, images, an object or symbol, something that was connected with those feelings.

Tapping: Even though nothing’s here yet, I’m open to seeing whatever I need to see…

Confused images came… .. then there was a tree… then her grandfather’s face… “Any feelings?”….. “Yes… missing them.” So we tapped for “this tree… my grandfather’s face… missing them” and as we tapped, other images from childhood arose, the places, the people… and feelings. I tapped to acknowledge the importance of what was arising, based on what I knew about her. This is someone who grew up in another country, a different culture and language, but had left that behind. “Even though I’ve moved on… my past is deep within me… these places, these people… my roots… missing them…”

I wondered out loud if this was connected with her desired new direction. I wondered if the child that she had been might hold the keys to her authenticity. She liked those thoughts, so I just tapped the points, “This deeper level of who I am … rooted in the past… who I was… that girl in that country… that culture… connecting with this part of me… ” This brought a wave of deep emotion and tears, which we tapped for.

Even though there’s so much deep feeling here, that’s okay… I can feel this now…

We had to end, but something so significant had happened. She felt like a channel into her deeper self had opened. She acknowledged that she had walked away from that past and had left it behind. But to be whole and authentic and move forward into more wholeness, she needed to reclaim that part of herself. Whatever that would mean. And she was open to that possibiiity.

Wow. I’d begun recording only when she’d found her healing room and gotten established there. I noticed that the actual work in the healing room had only been 12 minutes! And yet she had had a profound healing breakthrough.

I keep thinking about the tree and wondering if it was symbolic of those deep roots in her, as well as being a real tree. This is the power of imagery. An image can have many layers of meaning. I also think this story illustrates the new language that is emerging. It’s a language of allowing. “Even though….. I can be with this… that’s how I feel… I can let these feelings flow, etc.” This is now coming into all my sessions, language which helps us stay right in the moment, acknowledging and supporting in such a gentle way whatever is unfolding.
********************
For a free teleclass about Inner Theater and EFT and more resources, visit
www.creativeeft.com/Inner_Theater_Resource_Page.php

Filed Under: Rising Sun EFT Newsletter Archives

Releasing the Trauma from My Body – EFT in Slow Motion

April 26, 2009 By Betty Moore-Hafter

originally published in the Rising Sun EFT Group Newsletter

This article is the final installment of my report of using EFT very successfully for a broken wrist, the subsequent surgery and my healing.

A friend mentioned to me that the body registers an accident or other trauma in slow motion. What a profound thought. Of course, our conscious experience of any sudden accident is that it happened so quickly. There’s no time to stop it or change the course of things — in a flash, it’s all over.

I started wondering what would happen if I replayed the event in slow motion while tapping. If my body had registered various emotions and thoughts that I wasn’t even conscious of, maybe this would be a way to clear even more of the trauma.

I tried it and was truly amazed at what happened. When I put the event in slow motion, it went something like this:

(Here’s the background story: when the accident happened, I was carrying a huge load of wood from our garage and trying to maneuver my way between some bicycles. I lost my balance and went down, too top-heavy to right myself. I fell with all my weight on my left wrist and heard the bone snap.)

I started with the moment when I was first aware that something had gone wrong. Strangely I remember the words in my mind — I thought “I’m destabilized!”

“Even though I’m destabilized, losing my balance…. oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no!”

I paused the inner slow-motion movie at that moment and just tapped all the points for the “oh no’s.” This brought up a huge wave of fear and it cleared as I tapped. That’s the same thing I did with each of the following.

“Even though I’m going down, oh my god, oh my god!”

This one brought up shock, disbelief and terror. Tapping for “I’m going down, oh my god oh my god.” Huge emotion came up and was released.

“Even though I can’t stop, I can’t stop, I can’t stop!”

A huge sense of powerlessness. There was nothing I could do. More tapping.

“Even though I’m going to get hurt… oh no, oh no, oh no!”

With each little piece more emotion came up, along with tears. Finally I reached the point of impact.

“Even though I just hit the concrete, oh my god, oh my god.”

“Even though I heard the bone snap, oh no, oh no, oh no! ”

“Even though I’m hurt, I’m hurt, I’m hurt”

“Even though it looks really bad, really bad, really bad.” (my wrist was at a strange angle).

For anyone who is cringing, I will tell you that I was never in terrible physical pain. Maybe endorphins kick in, I don’t know. My main experience was absolute terror that I had hurt myself pretty badly.

Strangely, I couldn’t finish any of the above set-ups with “deeply accept myself” or anything similar. In the slow-motion process, it seemed that I just had to stop and tap with the exclamations and get the emotion out of my body. Then after all that emotion was released, I came back and tapped through all the points with the positive reassurance:

“But it’s okay now, it’s okay now, I’m okay, my wrist is okay… I want my body to know that everything is okay. I love and accept my body, you went through so much, but you’re okay now.”

After that process, which took less than 10 minutes, I felt like a million dollars. I’d done a lot of tapping previously and didn’t expect that there would be so much emotion left. But there it was, right on the body-level. The slow-motion replay brought it out. And once it was released, I felt great.

Some weeks later, I had the opportunity to present to a group of psychotherapists and the topic was EFT for Trauma. I told my wrist story, including the part about going through the event in slow motion. These professionals were especially impressed by the slow-motion tapping and said that it made perfect sense. As they explained it, the brain cannot process everything that is happening so fast, and our system is overwhelmed. The details and the horror are registering but not on a conscious level — they remain as if frozen in the body. This is a major component of Post Traumatic Stress. They saw great value in this process of unpacking the trauma little by little, tapping for every possible piece of the slow-motion replay. Of course we talked also about the Tearless Trauma Technique and how in many cases, you would not address the details until you had tapped for the fear and dread of even going there.

So I’ll add Slow-Motion EFT to my toolbox now. I never would have chosen to break a bone. But the experience of healing my wrist using EFT and the Creative Language approach has taught me so much that I can be grateful for the experience now. Isn’t that one of the great things about knowing EFT? Almost any life experience is an opportunity to help yourself and to learn more about helping others with this wonderful tool.

Filed Under: Rising Sun EFT Newsletter Archives

EFT for Surgery & Healing – My Surgeon’s Perspective

April 1, 2009 By Betty Moore-Hafter

(originally posted in the Rising Sun EFT Group Newsletter)

I met with my surgeon, Dr. Benoit, at six weeks after surgery. I’d been in once post-op to get stitches out, but that didn’t involve a meeting with the doctor. So this was the first time he had seen me since performing surgery on my wrist.

When I told Dr. Benoit that the surgery had been a very good experience, he was surprised. He said he doesn’t hear that a lot! When I showed him the condition of my scar and the full range of motion that I have, almost 100%, he had to check his records. He said I was showing astounding progress for only 6 weeks past surgery. Of course I told him about what I do and how I’d used the body-mind connection, talked to my body, prepared mentally and emotionally, etc. He called in another doctor who was out in the hallway. Dr. Benoit showed him my x-rays, my scar and had me demonstrate range of motion. He asked the doctor — “So how long past surgery do you think she is?” The doctor said, “12 weeks?” Dr. Benoit seemed rather proud to say, “No — she’s only 6 weeks. Isn’t this amazing?”  Of course I briefly mentioned what I had done, and that doctor said, “Do we have a body-mind person in the physical therapy department?” Everybody laughed but you never know — maybe this will be a
n opportunity.

Dr. Benoit says he does at least 100 of these surgeries a year and has only seen this kind of healing a few times. “It’s major surgery. Most people drag along on pain meds for weeks. It’s amazing that you say you had so little pain and swelling.” I told him — and I’m sure this was a stretch for a surgeon — that I thought it was because I had informed my body and gotten rid of all fear. The day of the surgery, my blood pressure was normal. So my body didn’t have to panic with swelling and pain, perceiving the surgery as another injury. It was reassured and ready to cooperate.

My work with EFT has evolved more and more into a form that I’m calling Creative EFT. It’s a combination of hypnotherapy concepts and language with EFT processes. The work I did for myself during the entire experience of breaking my wrist, having surgery and working towards healing was of this nature. That it worked so well is great confirmation for me. Of course I’m really appreciating my body right now and telling it — “great job!” And I know it is the power of EFT and hypnotherapy concepts & understandings that really made this possible. I think some powerful body-mind communication took place, and that made all the difference. We are so lucky to have these powerful and effective tools.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

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